Sledgehammer blows.

I face this unfeeling wall...
I have run out of words for all this.
I try to forget.
I drown myself with work.
In the hopes to numb myself.
It works for awhile...
Where I expend myself feverishly.
I fall back again after
Into an empty cradle.
And all the thoughts of you come
Rushing unbidden.
The sweet memories are bittersweet.
The bad ones are sledgehammer blows
The ugly ones are poignant still...
Have I not reaped enough of what I've sown?
Am I no more than an insignificant speck in your eyes.

I am at wits end.
I feel... I wonder if I feel through all this at all?